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October 18, 2006 >> Rather honest at 3 am

I've found that, in life, it's important not to care if you die. That's not to say that I recommend becoming laconic or suicidal - you're not supposed to give up - but accepting inevitability seems to be a key factor in navigating such formerly pressing issues as:

-what the fuck am I doing
-is it okay to smoke this many cigarettes
-how will my individual skills become economically viable in the future
-why is this chicken breast not cooked correctly... it is blue in the middle and bleeding on my fingers
-will anyone remember me for anything good i've done

Somewhere in the middle of all this madness is a strange transcendence in no longer caring. Just... trusting. It's a bit of a battle, pushing this concept through my eyes and down, but when it's working I am no longer afraid.

And I look at all the lights outside my window, and the airplanes overhead.


Posted by Chris at 02:53 AM >> Commentations (5)

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