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Today didn't really feel like it should be a school day. It felt like the cusp of vacationtime. It felt like the edge of freedom. It felt like a day where children should do wordsearches while I stared at the clock. And it was So. The wordsearches were very difficult, specifically designed to be impossible for a normal child to complete during the span of a single 40-minute class.

I call these wordsearches the Mega Puzzle and have an accompanying song to lull the kids into its hypnotic grasp: MEGA PUZZLE mega puzzle MEGA PUZZLE mega puzzle... when the bell rung the kids all stumbled out of my room, clutching their Mega Puzzles to their hearts and gazing around at the 'World Beyond The MEGA PUZZLE' with fearful eyes. They no longer wanted to live in a place where hidden words can't be found both forwards, backwards and diagonally. As they left, I offered some existential advice I learnt from the Matrix: "The Mega Puzzle has you, bitches!" They needed to know.

I also taught two of the older kids to play poker and Christina kicked our asses at five-card draw. She even meticulously copied down the hierarchy of poker hands that I sketched on the whiteboard. I feel sad that I was beaten by a 12 year old girl, but happy knowing that I've turned her into a future gambling addict. Teaching is an egomaniacal mindfuck and eventually I will pay a terrible price for ruining so many futures.

It's clearly been a busy day. Tomorrow morning we leave for the socialist perils of China. See you in the year 2006!

Posted by Chris at 07:46 AM >> Commentations (2)