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"The past does not influence me; I influence it."
~Willem De Kooning
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Master Archives

These are the master archives of my news postings from the near and distant past, neatly organized by the ever-vigilant MoveableType into a gigantic fucking list. Why would you want to read old news, you ask? That's a good question, and one which I am disinclined to answer. Anyways, they're here if you want 'em.



Temporeturn
Cardboard tube / lightsabre: violence so sweet
Waking up to the day
Is this the end for our hero??
Conferencing!
Wunderwall... bar
White Night (Weeks Ago)
Dodgeball
Assisted Learning
Perpetual Mario Machine
Soft throbbing headache
Buy me some Dragon Force!
Skylines of Dubai
Lull storm lull storm
illness intermission
And one last thing about Dubai...
And another thing about Dubai
A slice of Dubai
Adventurers Ho!
me and me and me and mecha-godzilla
death and rebirth of the silver god
Surgeon General's Warning
One, Two, Three Strikes You're Out
Hot summer nights
Ten Thousand Knives
She sighed, hating seafood
Down trip
Poppin Bookz
I am zen, you are beast
You could listen for weeks and weeks
Empty head, crusted red and blindingly pimped
This Train is Now Out of Service
Gaming Growing Up
In Dialogue with the System
The secret is to ignore your alarm clock
Breakfast Is Ready, Come On
Mechanical Reproduction
It's hot sort of
rofflecopters and lollercoasters
The absent professor
Edmonton
Your own personal blackout
Two men I don't-didn't know
Just down the road...
Happiness through destruction
Brand New Religion
A Zoo Tale: Geese Losing Their Patience
Updating Elsewhere
Abraham does it on Jetplanes
Bun yur Facebook
A Zoo Tale: Rhinoplasty
Game gabber
Doctor Dent
"I'm a Fucking Guitar Hero!" Plink plink plonk
Which came first, the Jesus or the egg?
Propose this!
Growing Up and Out
Shameful Real Estate Plug
300 Falsehoods
Response to Balls
Drilling Through
Lovecraft Eats Small Children
Handout Formula
Bizarro Clemens
Video Games on the Tee-Vee
Irony takes Birthday Beats
Memoirs of a Marker
A fistful of lessons
Buy back in
How am I not myself?
Are you a violent white male?
What if the Cyborg was really-real?
The Inexorable March of Life
Belinda Corresponds With Clemens
Turtle Tail Template
Chickens Past and Present
Computron Etiquette
Honour in Anything
Learning in Transit
A Little Sass and Class
25
2007
Barkley Barks Again
Pieces of us, evidence of life
Hush little piggy
Hoods 4 Armageddon
Re-enactment
Poor Intelligent Design
War on the Board
Trouble in the Gaybourhood
HALarious
Garbage! Violence! Enthusiasm!
Wires Away
Professional Life Coaching
Beerfest teaches you politics
USA! USA! USA!
Ante Anty Ant
I (Forcibly) Recalled the Grocery Pig
I Recalled the Floppy Hat Cat
Racially blind for 50 pages
I am not crazy
SudVegas
Big Nick
Jetplanes of Abraham Hypertext
Bank on China
Borat Fallout
Fiction Afterwards
November Slims
Synapse to Synapse
Zine
Clock set match
The Anti James Bond
Slightly Prior to the Dark
Sexpo
Kentucky Fried Chagrin
Rather honest at 3 am
Scintillating Media Review!!
Your Place in Society: Mask Sexxor
A Bent Barrie Thanksgiving
Fashion Narrative
In standard format and style
Sadly Gradly
iLL (L and I)
Turn, Return and Strike Forth Again
Weekend update
Grimmetal
Assisted Learning
An Endless March of Citation
Computer Lab, Underground
Back Home
Wrapping up the gig
All-Natural Preservation
Teaching Privacy
No Leg Beg
Sleep Anywhere
Schizophrenic Seoul
Can I take your whore-der?
Dream Metal Tool
Superficial Pickle
Thanks for coming, and...
Scary Crazy Soju Man
The Rise of Mercury
10 baht, 15 minutes
Scorpion Feast
Just Sayin'
Save your soul. Find my droid.
Mania
Boryeong Mud Festival
Nature's notice
Relative Suckage
Everything/Nothing
Twins, Born and Made
Piety and Spiritual Warfare at Olympic Park
Stop and Evaluate
Fire Hazard
We Do Jeju-do... a long time ago
Exit Wound Bleeding Red
Weightless
Korean Kids Attack!
Additional Documentation
Stern Warnings in Rafting
Consorting with Devils
Camp Mandatory
David Lynch, you crazy!
Splash the internet and we all ripple
666 & Jenny Antichrist
K1 World GP: Choi Man Invincible Face
Kickboxing Quandary
A Tale of Two Suburbs
Election Day
Animeh
Cass Bar Diversion
The Young Visit the Dead
'Special' Report
When Bunny Met Puppy
World Cup Stadium
The Wedding Spiral
The TRAX Once Traveled
Effrontery
Now we're cooking with gas, on your trash
Song 4 is Champion!
The Sutra of the Distant Past
At the Pirate DVD Street Stall: Ong Bak 2
A Tale of Two Claras
Slaughter at Seoul Tower
Thinking about Lying
Binary Calls
BOOM! Headshot!
Zoo Zoomer
Binary, choose a path already
Candleless
Speak for me, please
Intermission
Sweet Jam Departure
Meditate and Destroy You
Just sway
Halla Hockey
Lame Fight Club Diatribe
Oh yes
White Day
Elderly and Reasonable
Small
Simple
A Korean Assault on Jazz
Guided Tour
Worry, worry, super scurry
Basketball
The Funky President Comes to Town
This Moment in Sports
Graduation Day
Mike coined the term 'mak-o-lait', not me
Wist
Numba One Stunna
The Makolay and the Museum
Interjection and Invasion
New Year Number 2: Korean Kung-Fuery
Snow Sled is Yes!
Danyang
Live from Suanbo (sp?)
Away from the heart
Still Learning New Tricks
ConservaCanada
Chinally
You Stupid Fuckers!
MM
Comical Indignation
Chronicles of a Conference
AniSaturday
Birthday Sap Comes From Christmas Trees
Old Boy
Jamie Opso
So this is the New Year
MEGAPUZZLE 2006
Jessica Presiding
'Tis the Season
What's on TV...
Ring Ring Ring
Kung Fu
Harry Potter in Korea
A Curious Supremacy
Nachos
Get Here
Demilitarized and Disabled
Tomboy
No
Buying a Sandwich
See Food
Sever Brain From Fingers
Terry Turkey, Killed in Korea
Couch Stealing
Advertise Here
Heatsink
Daegu
The theme is Pepero
Scramble
Texas Lonestar
Drive Me to the Love Hotel!
Zoo World Litany
Halloween Whores I Mean Horrors
The Children Update
Conversation 2
The Finished!!!
Octoberfest bitches!!
Turtles turtles rah rahra!
It's a weak week for grammar
Crackers in Korea
Reincarnation tip #130076
Payday
Traveller
Take a Picture & Hold it Close
Frustrated by...
Drawings of Children and Other Devilish Things
Purchase My Circuits
Photogenics
Sexy Bar Sticker Party
Magnificent Failure
Engrish
Itaewon Revisited
Teacharoo
Week 2: Living With Pears and Dumplings
Week 1: Culture Shock
Week 1: Arrival
Week 1: Leaving Vancouver
Week 1: Beginnings
Korean Start Happy-Time Now
Canada's Last Post
Happy Mom Learns About Me Smoking Day
Television
Barkley the Retarded Dog
On a Plane
Primed
Post Blog Party 1/2
Blog Party Final Hours
Cord Ed Board - Tha Singlez
Shorthand
Risk Management
I Really Don't Know.
Kimono
Diaryboy
Beneath the Encasing of Sawdust
Gamble & Forget
We're going to need you to just pack up your office by Friday, mmmkay?
Eastern horizon
Wrestle the Words
Image Gallery
HOT TIP!
Suburban Tragedy
ImageCrash
Murder (ball)
Pressing Matters: Tudor / Blog Party
BLOG PARTY
Your Blog Sucks
Blogconceptpeople
McBoycott
Temporary
Book Report
Here In My Bedroom
Gather
Hillsider
Firespinning
Rapid Motion of Fingertips
On Eating Charmless Children & Ugly Dogs
Skipping Rope is the New Pink
More Important Questions
Dear CityTV, IMPORTANT ISSUES!
Social
Happy Discover Laurier Day!
Master Quiz... I'm done with thee
Master Quiz... you are dark and gothic
Master Quiz... I see you have returned
Dreamscape Dogs
Something Blue
Tidemeover
OSAP: the sinkhole of champions
Longish Weekend
The Maple Leaf & The Missing Rib
Patriot act
Sage Nothing
sXe
Morality lesson
Bathhouse Politics
God in 60 Questions
hatelove
Free Speech & All That
Reflectionatoire
I'm a judgmental dick, I know.
Cop-out Notext
Breath of Sunshine
Hurrying the wheel
Abandon Hope, Ye Who Enter
Randomizer
Turning the Leaf
Presenting present presence
lazyhipstercloned
Variety pack
Me and mine
Grad Does Not Lend Itself Well To Catchphrases
Buy Canada, Sell America
Bubble-wrap and salve
It's...
Dirty Phil's is with you, always and forever
Mansplashing Hillbilly Jim
He goes outside
Belindicated
What? Trees. Trees and TV.
C'mon, Yeah, Uh-huh, Do the Belinda Bump
Pokerfingers
Breaking through
The green bead
A blue bead and a green bead
Shooting arrows
Carnivore
Stabbb
In Japan, student teach you!
Carrying cancer
Arcade Fire Separations
Another step in the process
Chatting Like Adults
Gamestack
The original title was too long.
420
Weakender
Gigantopussoir
Message this
History spoken
Disclaimer
Kegger checklist
Vag. Cunt. Poundbox.
Early morning nothing
Third Time's the Charm
Assez Essay
Chicken Tettrazini and Lilacs
Take 2
Gradblow
Public transportation
Certifiable
An Esoteric Easter
Cream of Canadian Content
Oppressed consumer!
I love it a lot
Oh shit!
All quiet
Thanks Freud!
Valuable St. Patty's Day Update!
Shamrock Shyster
Dig and dig and dig and dig
Nobody plays the lute
brb
And she knows all his favourite songs
Waking Moments
Uninspired
Aimless
Facsimile
Eulogy
Hastefaced
Gonzo is gone
Scripted Smashing
Highway 401
Jesus the negotiator
Musical moment
Look the other way
Valentine's Day
Social fabric
Coulterized
Waking life
Rushed out the door
Question.
Video games OR What is reality?
Call it aftermath
The stench of Error
Flusteration
It pays to get involved!
Searching for nothing & finding it
Silver gods and seagulls
An ode to my desk
I'm a little bit of nothing
Pirates aren't very funny
Wanna be a rock superstar
My dark lord is named Higgins
You know...
Leading by example
Mood: Fat and Sassy!
Happy Homicidal Mix CD Day!
Progressive retrospect
On the brink of a Livejournal
My time is not your time
Merry Christmas, Bitches!
It's Happening Again
Self Awareness
Freud is in my brain
Selfishness
Right Wing Resentment
Outsourcing
West Coast relationship insights
New Content Bonanza!!
Plagiarism
Moving Onwards
But you don't mean a thing to me...
For Laura Hoodie
November...
Still waiting for the spokes to turn
(with upwards momentum)

Inclusive
Theme party for bottom wheeler
Marriage
Duel Wield
Absentee Squirrels
A Call to Arms
Strange Days
Devil's Night (Plus One)
So beautiful, but so alone.
A fresh start, a new morning.















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