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I spend more time in this fucking grad lounge than anyone I know, except for maybe this asian lady who has apparently moved in. She has loaded the fridge with three bags of groceries, and I think she has a tiny bed set up behind one of the study cubicals. That said, we have a swipe-card system for getting in the front door and I think I probably hold the record for the most total entries - yet another reason why smoking is beneficial. Winning the Grad Lounge.

You know that whole urinal deal where the object is to pee as far away from other dudes as possible? Well I think there's the same system at place with computers in public places, except with a twist - you always want the computer furthest away from everyone else unless it sucks. Urinals are always the same: you pee in them, they take your pee unconditionally. Pretty straightforward. Computers, on the other hand, are a varied bunch.

The 'urinal system' might dictate that you should take the computer on the far end, opposite the asian lady (who apparently owns the best computer ALL OF THE TIME) but maybe the mouse is sticky on that one. Or you'll try to leave a computer space between you and the people on either side, but that particular machine is loaded with spyware and insists on showing you gay porn montages every fifteen minutes. Some computers don't have Word. Some computers are just hands down pieces of shit.

Funnily enough, those sidelong looks you get in the washroom when you break urinal etiquette still apply in the computer lab. Like, why the hell are you sitting next to me? Well bitch, it's because this is the only available computer without pretzel pieces and salt embedded in the keyboard! I think I'm going to eat all her groceries the next time she leaves.

Posted by Chris at 10:28 AM >> Commentations (0)